28 Things I Learned in Life As I Turn 28
As I’m about to turn 28 in a few weeks, I thought that I could take this time to talk about all the things I’ve learned throughout my life. Here are 28 life lessons that I have come across and I hope that next year brings even more joy.
- Education Helps You Live the Life You Want
When I was younger, I knew that I had to go to school and get good grades, but I realized that getting an education can provide me the opportunities that I needed in order to grow, be successful, enjoy what I do and live a happy life. Getting an education does not mean that you should just get through high school, obtain your Bachelor’s degree and then maybe get a post graduate degree. Regardless of whether you get those degrees, you will need to keep up with what’s changing in your field. For example, I did my Bachelor’s and Master’s degrees in Computer Science, but I know that technology is always changing and I need to continue learning for the rest of my life, and learning has become just as enjoyable to me as playing a game. What you end up doing in life translates to the type of lifestyle you have, so think about the lifestyle that you want, along with what you enjoy doing. When you enjoy what you do for a living while living your desired lifestyle, you have already become successful.
2. Save More Than You Spend
We live in an era where ads pop up on our phones, and these algorithms are designed to know us better than we know ourselves! Debt has become the new norm since you can finance anything these days. My rule of thumb is that unless I’m purchasing a home, I will not finance anything else. If I have the money and I’m able to afford it, I’ll buy it in cash.
When you save more than you spend, you tend to have more peace of mind, knowing that if anything were to happen to you at your job, you would still have at least 1 year’s worth of your salary saved, that way you can pay the bills and get essentials such as groceries. If you try to live a lifestyle that is beyond your means, eventually you will be in debt or go bankrupt. But when you live within your means, while putting a nice portion of your monthly pay into savings, you’re setting yourself up for financial independence, meaning that you have enough income to live off of for the rest of your life without having to be employed or be dependent on someone.
3. Explore Many Different Things at a Young Age
When we’re kids, we tend to question many of the things around us, and we don’t know what we may end up liking unless we actually do that activity, whether it’s playing soccer, solving puzzles or learning math! Sure, it may require some effort for you to actually start doing that activity, but once you do it, you may actually end up enjoying it and even making a living out of it when you get older. If we’re told to just do one thing at a young age or set our sights towards becoming one thing, we won’t know what we’re capable of.
4. Money Isn’t Everything
There’s a famous saying that “Money can’t buy happiness”, but that’s not entirely correct. For someone who’s struggling financially, having money would allow that person to live under a roof, not worry about when they’ll get their next meal and not worry about transportation costs. Money is definitely a tool to live the life that you want, but there are many things that money can’t buy, such as your personality, your demeanor, your relationship with your family and friends and so on. Many of the happiest people on Earth are not millionaires, and the happiest people make the most out of what they have rather than dwelling on the things they don’t have.
5. Exercise Exercise Exercise
Exercise allows you to be a better version of yourself. Your body loves it when you lift and move. Many of us in society have desk jobs where we sit all day, move when it’s time to eat lunch, head back to our desks, end the day by lying on the couch while watching TV, head to bed and then repeat this cycle all over again. Having a sedentary lifestyle is detrimental to your wellbeing, and even if you don’t know where to start, just know that there are many workout plans out there that you can try based on your goals. The whole meaning of exercise is that you should be moving, so even getting a walk outside is good for you.
For me personally, I realized back in March on how much weight I put on due to the pandemic and staying at home. My weight had gone up to 172 pounds, and I was not content with how my body was looking when I’d look at myself in the mirror. I knew that I had to get in shape and be the best physical version of myself, so I got help and guidance from someone who taught me what I needed to focus on, such as eating at a caloric deficit and doing full body exercises. I have been consistent with my regimen for 8 months and I’m happy to say that I’ve lost 25 pounds of fat while gaining strength and muscle, and I couldn’t be more happy. You have to enjoy the process, otherwise you won’t achieve the results that you want. Not only does exercise help with your physical health, but it can also improve your mental state.
6. Keep Tabs on Your Mental State
Think about all the things that can affect your mental health, whether it’s the relationships you have with the people closest to you, your current job, getting good grades in school, how your finances are doing and so on. When you make a list of all the things that affect your mental state, rate them from 1 to 5, where 5 means that you care more about this category and 1 being that you can still get by even if that thing is lost. When you rate each category, think about why you feel that you gave that rating. If you still feel as though something is bothering you, get help. There are many resources out there and even a hotline that you can call if you feel as though you need to speak with someone. Having close family and friends are also a blessing and can be there to help you in your hard times.
Even if you feel that your mental health is fine, visit a therapist. What’s ironic about our society is that we’re always told to get a physical checkup from our primary care doctor each year, but we’re never told to visit a therapist about the state of our mental health. By getting a mental health checkup, you have a better idea on why you feel a certain way about something.
7. Reading Can Expand Your Mind
I found that reading books allows me to be more creative, learn from others, and expand the universe that’s in my mind. By reading great books from great minds, you take so much away from what the author has to say, and when you make comparisons to your life on what’s in the book, or what your preconceived beliefs are about a particular topic, you end up getting closer to closing that knowledge gap and then you’re able to apply that knowledge elsewhere.
8. Your Home is a Reflection of Your Mind
When you observe the things around your house, whether it’s the extra clutter or the unmade bed, ask yourself why these things are placed this way or why the bed is not fixed. For example, let’s say that you’re someone who is always rushing to get to work because you have a habit of sleeping late, which results in you wanting to get those extra minutes of sleep in before you start the day, but then you need to shower, brush and get ready. But as you look at the clock, and when you account for traffic (or whenever you need to be online), you’ll end up rushing since you don’t want to be late for work, whether you’re in the office or at home. So as you start working, all you can think about is completing your work for the day. After a long day, you seem hungry and tired that you just want to crash and binge a show on Netflix. You end up sleeping late and then the cycle repeats itself.
When your mind feels like it’s all over the place, your home will reflect that. This is why you should take care of yourself and organize your things at home because your home will start looking nicer and you’ll feel happier that you have a clean and organized home.
9. We Are Meant For Growth
The human brain is an amazing thing that there’s even an entire field of study that is dedicated to learning how the brain works! Our brains allow us to learn and grow, because if the brain is static, we probably wouldn’t have learned to walk. When we’re infants, we try to make sense of the world around us just by moving. We don’t know that we’re on planet Earth, we don’t know that we’re human and we don’t know how to count. Our brains allow us to learn these things over time and as we get older, we’re able to make sense of everything around us. No one is born knowing their ABCs or even knowing how to count to 10. You first learn to crawl, then to walk and then to run. Everything in life is in stages, and if you ever felt that something was hard, that’s a good thing, because it means that you’re learning. If everything was easy, you wouldn’t be learning. It’s better to tell people that you appreciate the growth that they’re having when you see them struggle when learning a new concept, that way you’re pushing them to keep going. We always see the end result, but we never see how much time and effort it took for someone to get there. Keep growing and pushing yourself.
10. Being Kind Doesn’t Cost a Penny
You never know what someone may be going through, so it’s always best to be kind to people, and being kind does not cost you anything. Even smiling at someone can make their day. It’s amazing to think that just a smile can turn someone’s day around. Kindness goes a very long way, and I believe that kindness mixed with patience is something that we ought to master. But before we be kind to others, we must first focus on being kind to ourselves, that way we can project ourselves onto others.
11. Talk To Your Parents On a Regular Basis
Your parents raised you and made many sacrifices for you that way you could have a good life. The least we can do is call them on a regular basis, whether it’s once a day, every other day or a few times a week. Parents really appreciate it when you call them because all they want is for their kids to think of them, regardless of where they are in the world. It’s sad to see when people cut off ties with their parents over misunderstandings and other things, and although I may not know your situation, all I can say is that work on trying to remediate that relationship with your parents if it is broken. The last thing your parents would want is for you to not be on good terms with them until the day they leave this world.
There are always disagreements or things that children and parents may not see eye-to-eye, but at the end of the day, parents love their children. By giving you a roof over your head, 2–3 home cooked meals a day, taking you to and from school, sacrificing opportunities elsewhere just for your sake and even having those sleepless nights when you were a baby are just some of the things that they’ve done for you as you’ve grown up. Although parents may not ask for it, treat them somewhere and do nice things for them.
12. Create More Than You Consume
I recently learned about the create/consume ratio, and this ratio measures how much time we spend creating something (learning also falls into this category) and consuming something. Consumption can include things such as binging a show on TV or playing video games for hours. By creating more, you actually find a better purpose for yourself and for others as well, and you become more valuable to the world as you keep learning and creating things. I’m a big PS5 gamer and I love playing story driven games since I feel immersed into that world, but I make sure that I at least get some personal work done that way I can enjoy it more. Creating and learning has gotten to a point where I equate it to playing video games, since I really enjoy the process.
13. Give Back To Others
You worked hard. You got to where you want to be in life. However, you didn’t get there all alone since you had help from family, friends and mentors. Now it’s time to give back to your community and help those around you who are on the same boat that you used to be on. Giving back allows you to bring that elevator of success down, that way others can enter it and be successful as well. Give some money to charity every month. Volunteer at a shelter. Pick up the trash in your community. All of these actions allow you to give back.
14. Learning Never Stops
If you think that learning ends once you get your degree, you’re sadly mistaken. Learning is a nonstop process that allows you to have autonomy and it will help you grow as a person. The saying “it’s a marathon not a sprint” applies to learning, and this marathon lasts forever. You’ll never know “everything” once you graduate, since there’ll be more to learn on the job and things will be changing, so you need to adapt to those changes in your field. Knowledge is something that no one can take away from you, and the more knowledge you have, the more valuable you are to the world.
15. Be Mindful of Others
When you’re with your social group and everyone starts talking about a particular topic, such as sports, there may be some people who may not be sports fans, and they end up feeling left out. Therefore, try to include everyone in the conversation, and even if the majority of the group talks about something that a few can’t relate to, try to have them relate to it. What I’ve learned is that people are more appreciative when you make them feel included in your conversations, and you end up increasing your bonds with them. Be mindful of your friends’ and families’ feelings, that way if you feel that something doesn’t feel right, talk to them or try helping them out.
16. Forgive and Move On
This is something that is tough on a lot of us. There are things we may have done that we haven’t forgiven ourselves for, and there may be things that others have done to us that we haven’t forgiven them for. When we have grudges, we don’t have peace within ourselves. Instead, we hold on to these grudges for as long as possible without forgiving and giving that person another chance, especially if that person apologized to you for their mistakes. Even if that person didn’t apologize, be the bigger person and forgive. Forgiving can help you be at peace with yourself, and even if you feel as though you wronged someone and couldn’t forgive yourself for it, then apologize to that person if you haven’t already, be sincere with it and promise yourself that you will never make the same mistakes again and then forgive yourself. Life is too short to hold grudges.
17. Give Yourself a Good Night’s Sleep
You owe it to yourself to be well rested. When you give yourself 7–8 hours of sleep, you end up waking up more refreshed and you have a great start to the day. Sleep is very important, because a lack of sleep can have detrimental effects on our bodies. By sleeping, you’re letting yourself recover from all the things that you did throughout the day, and sleeping also helps aid with learning, since your brain is in that diffuse mode where it’s building all those connections of the concepts that you learned.
Have a sleep ritual, where you turn off your electronic devices about an hour before you sleep. Brush your teeth and wash your face. When you get to bed, have your lamp on as you read your favorite book or magazine. Meditate if you want to. I sometimes use the Calm app to help me go to sleep by doing one of the sleep sessions. As you keep doing this sleep ritual, your body will know that it’s time for you to sleep and it will be easier to get into that state.
18. Keep Drinking Water
The human body has about 70% water. That’s a lot! Sometimes we need a reminder to keep drinking water, that way we don’t get thirsty. 64 ounces is the recommended intake, and even though it may be a lot, it’s good for your body, as it helps to reduce cravings and control your appetite. Personally, I drink soda on special occasions, but 9 times out of 10 I’ll always choose water over any other drink.
19. Compliment Others Often
When you notice some good qualities amongst your friends and family, let them know! This not only motivates them to get better at what they’re doing, but they really appreciate you telling them. When you see someone who’s doing something that impresses you, tell that person how great they are at it.
20. Success Does Not Come Without Struggle
Billionaire Mark Cuban once said that he has failed more times than anyone else he’s ever known, and he’s now one of the richest people on the planet. The success that he achieved was not easy, and neither was it easy for people like Bill Gates and Elon Musk. If you’re not struggling along the way, you’re not doing it right. When I was in middle school and high school, people would tell me that they did not study, yet somehow ended up getting better grades than I did, so if I studied for hours and got a 92, which I should be happy with, I’d see someone make a 95 without studying and I would think that I wasn’t smart enough because I had to study the material. I was completely wrong with that belief, because even if the person was telling the truth about not studying, they wouldn’t actually grow, and the hard work and struggle is all part of that growth. Remember, when you go to the gym to work out, you’re going to feel pain and you’re going to struggle many times, but that pain and struggle will lead to greater results.
21. Apply Yourself
Applying yourself when you’re learning new things helps you retain that knowledge for a long time. We may just read a lesson from the book or listen to what the teacher talks about, but actually thinking deeply about the concept or topic and then applying that knowledge by teaching it to others or writing down what you’ve learned goes a long way.
22. Doing Nothing is Okay
What do I mean by doing nothing? Maybe stepping outside and feeling fresh air as you just stare out into the open and observe the things around you as you live in the present is something that you ought to be doing. Hence, nothing. When I applied this practice of doing nothing, it made me feel at peace and live more in the moment, and by doing this practice, it allowed me to feel good about the things that I have in my life and reflect on myself. It’s a really nice way to relax and move away from all the distractions that come to us during the day.
23. Deep Work Goes a Long Way
Deep work is this idea where you allow 0 distractions to come your way when you’re being focused on a particular task. Being in this state allows you to take in everything that you’re learning, making those connections in your brain, and having you appreciate the fruits of your labor, such as when you’re writing an application that could automate a task for you, or if you’re trying to get better at a particular basketball move and you finally see the end result. These results bring us joy, and by having no distractions, we’re able to commit ourselves 100% to the task.
24. Practicing Gratitude Will Make You Happier
Every day, I tell myself what I’m grateful for. By doing this daily practice, I remind myself that I am blessed and that I am happy to be living another day where I can improve and enjoy what this world has to offer. We’re in a capitalistic society where we’re told that having these new shoes will make us happier, or getting the latest phone will make us happier and so on, but happiness does not come from things; it comes from within.
25. Don’t Listen to Negative People
Have you ever been told by others that you don’t have what it takes to get to where you want to be? Have people constantly criticized you for the accomplishments that you’ve achieved rather than telling you that you did a great job? It’s always better to tune out what the negative ones say, because most likely there’s something that’s going on in their lives that they’re only projecting everything out on you. It’s better to keep going forward and doing what you can to make yourself better and to do great things for the world.
26. It’s Never Too Late To Change
I’m a firm believer that each human being is capable of changing, as long as that person is willing to make the change. If you feel that there’s something you need to fix yourself on, do it. Don’t think about whether it’s too late. It’s never too late. You are a human being and as a human being you’ll end up making mistakes. The best thing to do is to look at yourself in the mirror, record yourself, and say what you want to change about yourself. If you feel that it’s too late to work out, you’re only giving yourself an excuse to avoid going to the gym. A 63 year old man had started working out consistently while changing his eating habits to where he got a six pack at age 65. Just remember, we are in control of where we want to be, and as human beings, we are dynamic creatures that are capable of changing for the better.
27. Habits Are Powerful
It’s said that humans are creatures of habit, and what we do each day is a manifestation of all our habits, such as brushing our teeth when we first wake up in the morning without having to think about it, then showering, then getting ready and so on. These tasks allow our minds to be on autopilot that way we can save our thinking for tasks that actually need it. It takes about 3 weeks to form a habit, so give yourself 3 weeks to do something, such as learning a new topic, reading, going to the gym, waking up early in the morning and so on. Once these habits are ingrained into your system, you never have to think twice about doing them, and the more you keep doing them, the better you become.
28. Enjoy the Process
What do I mean when I say “enjoy the process”? Enjoying the process is probably one of the biggest life lessons I’ve learned, so even if I have goals that I want to achieve, I need to enjoy the process that I have in place for them. If I don’t enjoy the process, then I know that I’m not going to achieve what I’m hoping for. Goal setting is really good for setting directions, but having a system that you implement where you enjoy the process will help you go a long way, and even when you reach that goal, you’ll have your system to thank for that. When you implement a system, you tend to have these habits stick with you for life, so just because someone has a goal of winning a race does not mean that this person will stop working hard to win other races or marathons. Instead, you keep going and making yourself better than where you were the day before or the week before.
